Completed this book before school starts…
David Brooks’ How to Know a Person is a heartwarming guide to fostering genuine human connections. In a world of surface-level interactions, Brooks inspires us to embrace curiosity, empathy, and vulnerability to truly see and value others.
A standout concept in the book is the contrastbetween Illuminators and Diminishers. As Brooks explains, “Diminishers make people feel small and unseen. They stereotype and ignore.” Conversely, Illuminators “shine the brightness of their care on people and make them feel bigger, deeper, respected, and lit up.” This distinction is a powerful reminder of the impact we can have on those around us.
Brooks offers simple yet transformative advice: listen without an agenda, ask thoughtful questions, and pay attention to not just words but also silences and expressions. He also shares cautionary tales of behaviours that erode relationships, challenging us to reflect on our own actions.
One of the most inspiring lessons is that understanding others is a skill to be cultivated. Brooks writes, “To know a person is not just to see them but to feel their presence, to sense their full humanity.” His vulnerability and personal anecdotes make this advice both relatable and actionable.
How to Know a Person is a must-read for anyone looking to deepen their relationships and become an Illuminator in an often disconnected world. It’s a beautiful reminder that true connection begins with curiosity and compassion.
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